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February 02, 2006
A Bloggers (Silent) Poetry Reading
THE WIFE TAKES A CHILD
She has come next door to practice our piano.
Fat worms, her fingers hover over the keys,
dolce, dolce, advance to a black note.
I call out answers: she blinks a trusting eye.
From the window I can see the phlox
bank and flower, the violets' broad train
at the yard's edge, and beyond, the bee-boxes,
each one baited for summer with a queen.
Love, how long must we reproduce ourselves
in the neighbors' children, bees in false hives,
bright inviting blossoms, mine for a season.
Against the C-scale's awkward lullabye
I carry the offense of my flat belly,
the silent red loss of monthly bleeding.
Poetry Reading by Grace's Poppies, found via Juno
Posted by Cara at February 2, 2006 08:21 AM
Topics: Life
Comments
Powerful words. My thoughts and hopes are with you and G as you work to make your family. You will be fabulous parents when you do get there.
Posted by: PumpkinMama at February 2, 2006 08:38 AM
{{{{{{{{{{{Cara}}}}}}}}}}}} and G, too, of course.
Posted by: Jen at February 2, 2006 09:00 AM
Dear Care, as one who had been in that poem and come out the other side, I offer hope and prayers. Be gentle with yourself.
Posted by: Ann at February 2, 2006 09:15 AM
I posted about my jaywalkers..if I could keep my head screwed on they'd be going better!!! LOL.
Posted by: Cheryl at February 2, 2006 02:52 PM
Cara... I lived with this for 18 years.... infertility...
a scourge.... wearing the sign childless on my chest....like the big red A in THE SCARLET LETTER... not fitting in..... feeling inadequate.... not coping.... I gained 100 lbs.... I loved my dog to excess...I hated my husband.... I did the routine.... the shots, the pills, the hormone swings.....the trips to the hospital...the sex on a schedule.... I've been there... I UNDERSTAND....at 38 I got the surprise of the life...his name is Brian Thomas....you never know.... they (whoever they are)-- talk about God's time... I was mad at God...
he took too much time... if you ever want to talk about it... here I am...
Posted by: Cheryl at February 2, 2006 05:59 PM
I, too, have the emotional and physical scars from infertility. In my case it was secondary infertility. Now as I type, with my newly adopted Guatemalan daughter on my lap, I am vividly reminded of the pain I once was in. My heart goes out to you.
Posted by: nikki the blogless at February 2, 2006 08:05 PM
Damn girl, you make me cry. I love you. Lots.
Posted by: Jen at February 2, 2006 09:20 PM
This is powerful. I am just learning of your journey, but thought you may like to know about a dear friend of mine in her mid-30's who was having trouble conceiving.
She went on a well deserved beach vacation, had a few obnoxious frozen beverages, relaxed...and poof. She has a beautiful 4 year old.
Struggled with it again 2 years later...went on another vacation, and POOF! Now she has two beautiful girls.
It's got to be proof that our bodies know when we are ready. I hope you book that trip!
Posted by: playfulindc at February 3, 2006 11:59 PM